


Opinions: Everybody's got one.

by cunning_monkey



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-22
Updated: 2014-07-22
Packaged: 2018-02-10 00:49:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2004564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cunning_monkey/pseuds/cunning_monkey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy and Bruce navigate their way through a tower full of opinions.   Good thing they could care less.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Opinions: Everybody's got one.

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a long time since I've ventured into fic. Forgive the nerves.

“Tell me you’re joking.”

“I’m joking.” She pauses. “But I’m really not.”

“Isn't he too old for you?”

“Excuse me? How old is your boyfriend?”

“That’s different.”

“Oh, because he’s an _alien_ , that gives him an exemption from the age issue?”

“Don’t be like that. This isn't about me, it’s about you.”

“Yes. It’s about me being happy. So why don’t you go ahead and keep the judgement to yourself.”

“Fine.” Jane looks her in the eyes, but Darcy knows there’s more she’s not saying. “I still think he’s too old for you.” Nope, she said it anyway. _Great._

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“You can’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“You can’t date her. She’s out of your league.”

“Thanks.”

“No, seriously. She’s smokin’ hot and way too connected to the world for you. What could you possibly have in common?”

“A lot, actually. She know’s a lot about global iss…”

“Ehhhhh.” Tony makes a drawn out the buzzer sound. “Try again.” 

“She’s got a way with words.”

“So do I, but that just drives you crazy and pushes you to the brink of Sir Rage-a-Lot. Hit me baby one more time.”

Bruce knew Tony would be a hard sell, but he went for it. “She makes me happy.”

That does it. That shuts up Tony long enough for Bruce to make his escape. 

“For her sake, I still vote no!” Tony shouts as Bruce exits the door.

_Big surprise._

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“He tried to kill me once.”

“To be fair, you were the one responsible for bringing him aboard a traveling circus with no chance for escape.”

“He’s dangerous.”

“So are you. I don’t see you warning me off having lunch today.”

“I can control my threat level. He can’t.”

“Are you sure about that? Am I mistaken or did I see a poor kid piss his pants last week while talking to you?”

“That was… different.”

“It always is.” Darcy took a big swig from her wine glass, before smiling and picking her fork back up and focusing her attention on the most interesting salad in the world. Well, at least that’s what she would pretend if it let her off the hook from the Black Widow’s intrusive glares.

_Figures._

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“Friend Banner, I wish a moment of your time. What is your purpose with the Lady Darcy?”

“My purpose?”

“Yes. Jane tells me you have begun courting, and, as Darcy’s ‘brother from another mother’ as she has so labeled me, I wish to know your purpose.”  


“Thor, is this another way of asking what my intentions are?” Bruce couldn't help but smile a little at how surreal his life had become, and that’s saying something given the Other Guy.

“Yes.”

“What if I don’t have any? What if I just want to have some fun?” Bruce couldn't help himself, he had to play along. 

“Then I fear our friendship is at risk, and I caution you to reconsider. Darcy is very precious to me. If your intent is to use her as nothing more than a ‘fun’, as you say, then I shall have no choice but to fight you for the breaking of her heart.”

“Relax, Thor. I just left Tony’s lab and you’re not the first to approach me on the subject.”

“So the Man of Iron is also aware of the situation.”

“Situation? Really? Are you all really that bored without your brother to torment us? Listen, Thor, I assure you that Darcy and I have both given this relationship a lot of thought. We didn't enter into it blindly, okay?”

“Thank you, dear friend, for your assurances. I shall be most eager for the festivities of a Midgardian wedding.”

“Ummm…. yeah. Sure.” It was definitely time for Bruce to find a quiet spot and avoid people for the rest of the day. Or his life.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“Hey, Zap-happy, wait up.” 

Darcy turned around to glare. “Yeah, Grape Ape?” 

Clint laughed. “I heard you were goin' at it with the Doc.” 

Darcy stared at him. 

He grinned. “What’s that like?” he asked. 

“Go to hell.” 

“I mean do you like, time share with the big guy or?” 

“Clint!” 

He laughed and slung an arm around her shoulders. “Eyes open, got it?” 

She looked up at him out of the side of her eye and snorted. “Yeah.” 

“...and please make a sex tape.” 

Darcy laughed and jammed her fingers into his ribs as he squealed and backed away. She shook her head. 

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“Sit down. Both of you.”

While anyone summoned to Fury’s office was never for a ‘job well done’, Bruce and Darcy couldn't help but throw one another a knowing side smile as they moved to sit in front of the Director.

“Do you think I don’t know what’s going on?”

“Ummm… can you be more specific Dread Pirate Fury?” Darcy’s list of pirate references to throw at the Director had slowly being growing. It was a rare instance she actually got close enough to be able to use them, though.

“I’ll say this once. Nice and slow so you know I’m serious. If this ends badly, if people get hurt or either of you are compromised due to this decision, I will have both of you separately stationed to the most remote areas of the world with nothing but a set of jacks for entertainment. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir.” Oh, Bruce, always so formal. At least he stood up, signaling it was time to skedaddle. 

“Sure thing, One-Eyed Willy. Isolation. Jacks. Got it. Anything else?”

“One more pirate reference and I’ll demote you to my personal assistant. Trust me when I say you don’t want to pick up my dry cleaning.”

“Got it. Sure. Right. Great. No problem.” Darcy grabbed Bruce’s hand and led him out the door. 

“Phew, that could've gone so much worse.” 

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“Something troubling you, Steve? You've been hovering around for the past five minutes, without saying a word. You don’t frequent this department.”

“I just wanted to stop by and see how you’re doing. We haven’t, uh, talked in a while.”

“By any chance is this about Darcy?”

“Ms. Lewis? Well no. Not exactly.” He says turning away. “Yes.”

“Are you here to threaten me if I hurt her, because I can assure you, threats never go over well with the Other Guy, and besides, I’m pretty sure she’s the one wearing the pants in this relationship. I’m fairly certain I’m the one in danger here.”

“Is that something we should be concerned about? You know,” his voice drops to a whisper, “because of the Hulk?” 

“If I’m not worrying about it, for once, then we’re probably in the clear for now.”

“Well, she’s certainly got a lot of spark.”

“You can say that again.”

“She’s certainly got a… oh, right. Anyway, I’ll be off. I don’t exactly have a wealth of information or advice to give you.”

“Having no advice is probably the better part of valor at this point. It’s been one of those days.”

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Darcy was glad to see a chilled bottle of Pinot Grigio in the fridge. She desperately needed it after the day she had. Pouring herself a massive glass, she made her way to the couch, kicked off her shoes, and reclined as far back as she could without spilling. There was no way she was letting go of her glass. 

Hearing the lock click, she smiled to herself. The man of the day, er… the warning of the day? 

“You might want to help yourself to some liquor, I've had quite the day. Bottle’s open.” She called out as she heard Bruce head towards the kitchen.

“Pretty sure I need something stronger than wine.”

She loved that he had already unbuttoned his collared shirt and sat next to her with a Tony Stark-sized glass of whiskey. 

“So, did you expect anything different?”

“Well, I knew there would be a few comments, but geez, it’s as though they all have nothing else to talk about.”

“It has been pretty quiet.”

“Still, that’s the sort of response from letting ‘em in on us ‘dating’.”

Bruce couldn't help but laugh. “Imagine what they’ll do when we tell them we've been living together for months.”

“Seriously? You think that’s going to rock their socks off? Do you really think that’ll be a big deal once we tell them we super secretly got hitched last weekend?” 

Darcy couldn't help but laugh as she launched herself at her husband. _In my opinion, smartest idea ever._


End file.
